The Perfect SOLDIER
A FFVII Sephiroth x Cloud story
by Lara Yokoshima

VI. My first deception

That morning I woke up with a sour taste in my mouth. The graduation ceremony; then I remembered the glass of champagne that Sephiroth offered me. ‘Sephiroth!’

I opened my eyes immediately and raised my body from the bed, looking everywhere, somewhat puzzled. I was over my bed, still wearing part of my tuxedo and I touched the soft fabric with my thin fingers. Wasn’t I sleeping with Sephiroth the last night? Was everything just a dream?

I rose from the bed and felt dizzy when I did it, leaning myself to the wall to not lose balance. I had this terrible headache and I went to the bathroom to take a remedy. I opened the mirror and took out a small bottle filled with a yellow liquid and drank it in one gulp. I closed the door of the mirror, staring at my reflection for a moment. My face showed a weariness that I never thought I could feel, like if the day before I had run an entire marathon without a single minute of rest. I unconsciously placed my right hand in one of my pockets, later feeling a cold, and metallic object inside of it.

With curiosity, I pulled it out and I noticed it was the golden chain with that strange charm hanging from it. Vivid images from that night returned to my mind in that second. I stared a long time into emptiness with my eyes wide open, while I enclosed that charm inside my right hand. ‘Sephiroth… why?’

I returned to sit on my bed again; truly thoughtful, trying to understand why Sephiroth had chosen me that night, when he simply didn’t know me. Could it have been love at first sight, like when I first saw him on television? Or maybe giving me that golden chain was just some kind of dirty trick to take me to bed with him? He had surely thousands of those chains to give them as presents to any person he found attractive, and make him his lover for one night.

I needed answers, and I needed them now. I changed my clothes with haste, putting on some jeans and a white long sleeve t-shirt, running out of my room like in stampede, with the chain in my hand.

I asked everywhere if anyone had seen Sephiroth, some answering they didn’t know where he was, and some others just told me to forget about the whole thing, since Sephiroth rarely received any visits being the busy SOLDIER he was. If only they knew that the night before I slept with him on his bed.

I ran from one place to another, without any trace of his whereabouts. I tried to remember the location of his condo, but it looked like that building had just simply disappeared in the camp. It was possible that place wasn’t inside the military camp in the first place. How the hell could he bring me back to my bed without I noticing, without knowing where I lived? Sephiroth was indeed full of mysteries.

With my heart broken, I returned to my room. I decided that everything that had occurred was just idiotic and resigned my search for him, trying to forget. It was my fault in a way, to accede to his caresses and let him do with my body whatever he wanted. I was just a stupid town boy, seduced by a city legend.

One week passed after that ‘incident’, and I was still pretty upset. I entered the test to become a SOLDIER first class like Sephiroth, but now I didn’t know to keep searching for him or forget about the whole thing definitely. Now I just wanted to be a SOLDIER to meet again with him and try to clarify some matters. No, many matters.

But my luck was from bad to worse. Even though I was an excellent student that excelled in many subjects, I couldn’t even pass a simple combat test. They didn’t want me to explain why I failed, but my self-esteem lowered even more; my successes were useless now and new failures were added to my black list. I didn’t have any friends now. Travis left after graduating; he was transferred to Junon to specialize to become a submarine pilot. I became a loner. I didn’t even write to my mother to let her know about how things went after my graduation. It was not worth it. In fact, I was afraid to go back home, knowing I couldn’t enter the special SOLDIER school and hence, feel that I was just wasting my time.

One day I overheard a few soldiers while I was taking breakfast at the cafeteria; they needed a few soldiers for an important mission, leaded by Sephiroth. I went to check out with my superiors immediately, confirming the rumor. Indeed, an expedition to Nibelheim, my hometown, was about to take effect in a few days. They required young, graduated soldiers, and I thought that I could be one of the chosen for that mission.

That same day, I went to where they recruited soldiers, and signed up. Now I just had to wait until they called me, that if I got approved for the mission. I prayed to all the gods to happen that way.